Category Diary 2020

Final Assessment: Semester 1 Results!

Rachel Tan HX 3 Comments

Guess what – I managed to do well for the first semester! 😀

Those too simple, too brief alphabets you see under “Grades” is all there is to summarize all the hard work I put in for not just my exams, but all my other coursework throughout the semester.

My Final Assessment Grades
My Grade Point Average for the 1st semester of Foundation at university

The coursework I’m referring to includes two formal presentations, which took many nights of toiling and video-chat discussion with my assignment coursemates (which I have promised you I would blog about soon), all the full lab reports, one biological drawing which took a whole day just to draw (I’ll attach a photo of the drawing below!), a research essay and a cited chemistry poster.

Alongside that of course, we had to handle the 1st round of tests, then the 2nd round of tests, then our final assessment. We took 5 courses in our first semester, which adds up to around 15 theory-based test papers, based on the breakdown I did for you.

On top of that, all the exam papers this round has been deliberately made far more challenging, due to the fact that exams are open-book (with information from our lecture notes and the internet at our fingertips) during the Covid-19 crisis.

The biology experimental design video presentation we worked on for days was converted to a total of only 5 effective marks. The biological drawing which took hours of concentration, which I will now attach below, is only 6 effective marks.

NO shading allowed. Dense regions can only be indicated with furious, agitated dotting 😛

My wrist hurt a lot after drawing this. Haha! But it’s still my masterpiece.

As you can see from the 2nd photo I attached at the top of the post, I got a overall Grade Point Average (GPA) of 3.8511. That is well above the requirement to get into a medical degree, which is a CGPA of 3.50. However, if you notice from the first photo, I obtained below average marks for Chemistry, a GPA of 3.33. This is because my better marks in the other courses pulled my overall grade up.

Now, for the 2nd semester (which has just begun!), I am resolved to work hard and smart to obtain a 4 flat (GPA of 4.0). Admittedly, I had my father’s help in the first semester as he guided me using the printed lecture notes. His insight and intelligent input are priceless and highly appreciated, however, I had only half the burden to carry back then, and perhaps the training for stamina was much alleviated. This semester, he has helped me get a head start as well, but only in Mathematics.

The truth will prevail now, if I truly can manage to take on the responsibility myself and be competent enough to study, and learn, intelligently.

This is because to do well in exams these days, diligence is not enough. You need brains, you need to be able to think out of the box, and not take too long to figure out the concepts. It is an undeniable fact that to be a doctor you cannot just be hardworking, you have to be able to think intelligently as well. Dumbness and slowness is not welcomed in the healthcare industry, especially during your medical training. Both of which, unfortunately, I have a bit of in my nature. It is difficult for me to rush things, or else I will not be able to reap information properly.

Now, I must get back to studying for Biology! This semester, our biology course is known as Modern Biology (as opposed to Fundamentals of Cell Biology in our first semester). I find Modern Biology quite exciting, as it dabbles in the absolute basics of molecular genetics and biotechnology, which is particularly relevant to the COVID-19 virus mutation, and a very contemporary topic.

I am struggling to understand it for now, but with my determination I will do my best to overcome it, and make learning it fun.

Survival Comes First: This is how Malaysia’s education system should be improved.

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Survival comes first.

This phrase above is one many of you have heard of. I believe Malaysia’s education system should be improved based on these three defining words.

Lately, our government has been coming up with many changes in the KSSM syllabus, which, although fortunately has nothing to do with me as I have just started university, is having a great impact on my younger brother. He is quite unluckily studying Form 4 this year – the year subject to much excited experimentation ever since he was in his primary school years. This batch were always freshmen when it came to their studies; they would struggle to familiarize themselves with the new implementations, and whoops, new changes to your syllabus again, sorry about that. You’ve just got to deal with it.

For my SPM last year, the second last year of the old syllabus KBSM (I am two years older than my brother), already had had a few unnecessary subjects. I took 10 subjects, which includes Mandarin in my case. But there were a few subjects such as Moral, Sejarah (history), and certain elements in the Malay and Chinese subjects such as KOMSAS and “ancient Chinese” (Malay and Chinese literature) that… when I have ascended to university and look back at, now, I find it difficult to understand why we ever had to study those subjects. Now, there is apparently a new addition to the KSSM syllabus, which is the translation of classical Malay to modern Malay.

Sure, it’s important to learn good morals and values. Indeed, education about the body is imperative. Yes, learning languages and its evolution is always useful, may even be interesting. True, if history is not taught and remembered, how will we learn from past mistakes? How can we effectively culture in our children curiosity about the future if we have zero knowledge of the past?

However, as I do more reading and exploration in this unique time of Covid-19, I see less and less purpose in keeping ourselves learned scholars of ancient text and reading textbook graphics on how to do gymnastics with balls and ribbons. Is it more important that we memorize our riddled past until we can recite it off the tops of our heads, or that we learn what will help us survive now?

What are our priorities now, right NOW?

~~~

You are taking a walk with your child and they are going to step into a hole that might twist their ankle badly. It’s happening now! Any moment now! One more inch! Will you warn your child of the hole and how to avoid it in the future, or begin telling the story of when their great-grandfather stepped into a similar hole many decades ago?

Your child steps into the hole and sprains their ankle. You chastise them furiously. Next time, read more stories about your great-grandfather! You demand, and thrust a great book into their hands filled with his ancestor’s mishaps. A heavy book, too big for the child to see where they are going.

“And of course,” you go on, ignoring your exhausted young son or daughter, weighed down by the enormous book, “it will also be highly useful if you could learn ancient Greek, the language your great-grandfather happened to be using when calling for a lady nearby, when he cried for her help, to get him out of the hole he fell into – “

Your child steps into another hole and breaks their leg.

~~~

This is why, chase the future first before you pursue the past. It’s difficult to live without past memories, but impossible to survive without future plans.

It is now the hype of our era, with Covid-19 impeding life activities, the worst global warming in the last five years, and far too many of the trouble human beings bring upon themselves are due to not knowing or not realizing basic things. Yet our politicians now bite and snap at each other while the children of our future cramp their tired minds with our ancestors glories and mistakes.

Instead, teach our new generation how to avoid the online and phone call scams that are so easy to fall for. Teach them how to fight for their own entitlements, and the rights of others. Educate them on the importance of personal and medical insurance. Allow them ample opportunity for observations of anything and everything (of good nature), and let them take away the lessons. Teach them the perils of the “real life out there”. If the situation leaves us no choice but be “quanranteens” in primary and secondary school education until our syllabus finally becomes what really matters at university, by which time most of our youth is lost, then show us what real life is, in the confines of your home. Instead of implying that “real life” is a curtain that only opens when we leave high school or even beyond university, tear down the drapes and guide us in imagining real life. It is, in fact, the very age of global digitalization.

Answer our questions on why things happen. When your child, teenage son / daughter, or young student asks questions, don’t brush them aside. Understanding why is the key to improving tolerance of strange environments, tolerance of people who look and sound different, tolerance of complex issues that are difficult to solve. It is also the key to setting curiosity and motivation on fire.

Most of all, teach our new generation how to make their own choices. The right choices. And they will be able to do that, based on their understanding of why it is the right or wrong thing to do.

We will then automatically culture good moral values, exercise more for our own health and learn from past mistakes based on critical judgment.

Humans need not and should not be constantly only told what to do – it may very well have the opposite effect. They need to be taught how to know what to do.

Although this write up is also an object of my frustration with the education system, but here is the real message I want you to take away: learning anything of good nature is beneficial, to some extent. However, it is not about which are the correct subjects to learn, but about which subjects are more important.

Especially in this very moment, we don’t have time for marginally useful things. We need the cure, now.

Survival comes first.

~Rachel Tan Hui Xin, 11 September 2020.

A young girl working alongside medical staff: the little obstacles Part 1

Rachel Tan HX 1 Comment

Previously, I had written about my experiences working at the Covid 19 frontlines earlier this year, and a detailed list of my job scopes as a Patient Care Assistant at a small Malaysian hospital. However, I have never told you about the various events of sakit kepala (meaning “headaches” in the Malay language) I get from working there.

However, these little mishaps and frustrating events are now only in my fond memories, as they are great insight into what the healthcare system is really like, and remind me that there will always be things to worry about when it comes to the health of the people. It also dawns on me that running a hospital is not easy, and there are bound to be disagreements and inefficiencies in the system, even if everyone truly does tries their best to provide the best care for their patients. If I were to become a doctor in the future, I must not become one of the strawberry generation (in Chinese, a strawberry is said to “bruise easily”, symbolizing our new generation that cannot take little failures and hardships). Therefore, a little hardship is good for training the spirit.

Of course, when I am writing about this, I am aware I have to tread lightly.

The first headache that comes to mind is this particular time we tried to do something as simple as registering a patient, that needed to be seen outside the hospital due to observed possible symptoms of Covid 19. I was sitting behind the counter of the emergency unit, doing admin work (handling of registering of the patients, writing in the case log book, opening certain bills, preparing lab forms etc). I was already juggling more than three things in my mind when a doctor from the specialist center walked up to me and said: “I want to see my patient outside the hospital. Register her under the emergency unit.”

I was confused. This was a patient of a specialist doctor. She should be registered under the specialist clinic, not under emergency. What should I do?

I asked the nurses this question. “Hey, dia patient specialist centre!” called the nurse, voicing my concerns exactly. “Bagilah specialist department register patient sendiri.” (Let the specialist department register their own patient.)

I then brought this patient’s personal details form to the specialist center. I explained to them that a doctor under their department wanted to see a patient outside, and instructed me to register her under the emergency unit. “Jika doctor nak tengok kat A&E, registerlah kat A&E. Bukankah doctor sendiri dah suruh register A&E?” (If the doctor wants to see the patient at the emergency unit, register them there. Did the doctor not request for the patient to be registered there?)

That did make sense, so I left and walked back to the emergency unit, but I was getting more and more perplexed now. So, the question is, should patients be registered under their doctors’ department, or should they be registered at the location there were being treated? Yes, that is precisely the question. I did not know the answer to that, but I knew that there was probably no answer. Perhaps no one has even thought of it before, since it is the first time we have had COVID 19 come attacking the people and and our already overloaded hospital system.

Knowing that doctors usually have the final say in everything (and perhaps rightly so), I expressed this issue to that doctor. “Is it possible or not, to register her here? If it’s possible, I want her registered here. Just register her here.” He demanded, pointing down at our registration computer. I nodded and he bustled off.

“Um,” I said clearly, hoping my colleagues (nurses at emergency department) had noticed, so that they wouldn’t demand yet again why I was registering a specialist doctor’s patient under our unit. “Dr X said to register them here. So I must register them here.” A nurse next to me had heard and agreed.

I tried to register the patient, but… I can’t remember at this point what exactly happened, as it has already been a few months since I stopped working at the hospital, and all this studying at university has probably displaced all my prior knowledge of the details of working! I do recall something about this patient having just visited the specialist center yesterday or something of the sort, which meant that her medical record folder had not been sent back up to the medical record department (known for short as MRD) yet and was still in the depths of the cupboards at the specialist center. So the patient’s details had to be brought to the specialist center yet again, but this time the nurse next to me said she would handle it, storming off with the patient’s details. Just like that, I was no longer involved in this issue.

For your information, dear reader, this is not uncommon. When working at the hospital, I face problems with tracing medical record folders all the time. Hence, for my medical interview to enter foundation leading to MBBS at my university, in the essay we had to write on the spot on our ideas for improving the healthcare system, I suggested that a electronic medical record (EMR) system should be imposed widely throughout the country. My interviewers praised me for being well read, but actually, I still have a lot to learn, haha! It’s just that when you had worked for two months at a hospital facing exactly that kind of problem, with folders missing, hidden in the cupboards or I-don’t-know-if-it’s-at-Emergency-or-Specialist-Centre-or-MRD-or-could-it-have-accidentally-gone-into-the-trash, it’s difficult not to wonder about a solution to this issue yourself.

There are two things I have learnt from this event alone. One, the importance of implementing a electronic medical record system on all medical premises, but of course that takes time and perseverance on the part of the government. Two, I have also discovered that doctors make most of the primary decisions, and as a doctor in the future, I may not be as lucky as I now am to be able to bombard my colleagues with questions or push duties to my fellow nurses if I’m not sure about anything. If I were to become a doctor, my nurses may be the ones to look to me for answers and although doctors are human, too, you just cannot always be saying: “Sorry, but I’m not sure.” Along the way as I am taking in medical education, I must also ensure that I am well read and updated, and find ways to help myself become smarter and be able to think on my feet. That is what is required of a doctor.

Although I have faced many predicaments during my short time as a patient care assistant, I now remember them all fondly and I know they have all helped me in some way!

The truth is – I have managed many things efficiently, juggled five things in my head to do at once, taken orders from two people talking at the same time, run from the first floor to the third floor, and performed at my best on many days. However, I have also made tons of mistakes, been ordered about and scolded often, and faced many frustrating issues while working; but when I think about everyone’s higher purpose here – providing the best care for the patients, it is easy to take every problem with a pinch of salt. It really is. I think it is healthy, it is a blessing, to have a higher purpose. That is what I hope my medical career will be like in the future, since I am sure problems like these, or even much worse, cannot be evaded. I am going to work very hard to attain good results so that I may earn my place along those who own this higher purpose together.

Stay tuned for other obstacles I’ve faced while working at the hospital, during the Covid-19 crisis! I will make the links available here once I have written Part 2 and Part 3 of the little problems I’ve overcome while working. Bye for now 🙂

What you didn’t know about my blog…!

Rachel Tan HX Leave a comment

Hey everyone! I have not been blogging for more than 3 weeks now and I have SO much to tell you. My first semester is almost up, I am just done with my second round of mini tests and will be briefly updating you on a bit of my life in ANOTHER blog post after this before I go on hiatus again for my final assessment for the five courses I am taking this first semester, which will be here in no time. But first, I would like to share with you something you didn’t know about my blog.

The truth is…

I actually have only about 3 viewers average per blog post.

The reason why it has not been growing much is also due to my hesitancy to spread it on various platforms to give it a name. Although I know full well the means to get a blog to grow, I prefer to let it find its own way, given time.

This is because a lot of the things and events that I’m sharing here are semi-personal. In fact, if you have subscribed / been a reader of my blog for sometime, you would have noticed they contain snippets of the lives of other people I have met as well, such as my experience as a teenager working at a hospital in February and March this year (2020) and a tiny snippet of my interactions with patients at the hospital here. I am easily inspired by beautiful people, and the smallest of things make me define a person as beautiful; so if I can’t bear to write sparingly, I must share sparingly, in respect for my and their lives lived.

That is why this blog has not gained much traction, but for now I am happy with it that way.

I might give up on online fiction pieces I am working on, etc, but not this blog. I would like to continue working on this for as long as I can, throughout my life. It is not only be a place for me to share my story with you, it will also become a documentation of the roads I have tread for myself to relive years later.

To my current readers: I am so happy you have chosen to follow me on this journey. Thank you for being a silent supporter of my endeavours.

In my next blogpost, which I will write right after this, I will update you on the things that have happened in my university life recently! Hop over to the next page here!! 😀

What it’s really like studying SCIENCE in my university!

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“Let me tell you about the four main categories in science,” said our Biology lecturer, on our very first lecture of the semester in university. I could not see my coursemates, but I could feel everyone’s ears perk up. Whoever heard of four categories of science? We’ve only ever heard of three.

“First, math is the most fundamental,” she says. “Then what is the most basic science after that?” “Chemistry,” someone tried. “No, it’s physics,” said our teacher. True. I suspected that was why doctors are commonly physicians in the US, because the word physic originally referred to both the practice of medicine AND to natural science (Merriam-Webster, 2020). “Then the next would be, Chemistry, and then Biology,” she finished. “Then Physics is derived from Math, Chemistry is derived from Math AND Physics, and Biology has elements of all of the above.”

Wow.

One thing I have discovered as in the first few weeks of studying foundation in science at university is: every one of these scientific categories has elements of another category. Math is most fundamental, and therefore only seems to relate to nothing, when you study it on its own. But when you get to the “more derived” subjects, you will see all the interconnected relations between the sciences: there is differentiation (math) in Physics, there are complicated molecular structure of chemical compounds (chemistry) in Biology, and there are logarithms (math), gas laws (physics) and enzymatic graphs (Biology) in Chemistry.

It truly is really interesting, when you see the bigger picture come together. You see the purpose of why things happen; why you are studying math when it seems to be just about numbers. Seeing the patterns and interconnections gave me a new insight into the subjects we had been studying ever since high school; and I wondered why we weren’t exposed to this earlier.

But here’s the really cool thing. I am not sure about other universities. Personally, I am certain not many universities must have this weird concept in their foundation in science syllabus: in our recent Physics exam just two days ago, a white blood cell and a Bacteria (Biology) are racing toward Point A at the speed of 20μm/s and 50μm/s respectively. Calculate the relative velocity of WBC to the liquid…. I laughed, as I read through the question on my digital exam paper, in my room. Maybe exams and studies have dulled the minds of people, and they don’t play as much as I do, and they might find me too peculiar for their tastes. But little things make me laugh, and that does not compromise my intelligence. I think that was a very lighthearted element to include in an exam, a strange rojak, as we like to say here in Malaysia (rojak = a mixture of random foods, used to mean a mixture of random things / languages spoken together, etc).

It’s cool.

Many of my lecturers are really good teachers. They bring across the topic to us clearly, they are prepared for what we might not understand, possibly due to their years of experience, or credentials in the field. They teach us the why of things, which is the whole point of studying science, and a great way to pique our interest.

I am really grateful for the opportunity to study foundation in science at my university. It gives me a fresh insight into science. Although I have been more of a quiet person in my primary and secondary school years, I hope to grab this last stage of education – tertiary education – with both hands, and learn and discover as much as I possibly can.

~Rachel Tan Hui Xin, 20 July 2020.

References:

Meriam-Webster. (2020). Retrieved from https://www.merriam-webster.com/words-at-play/why-is-a-medical-expert-called-a-physician